Indonesian President Joko Widodo has told local and Australian media that he may decide to halt the execution of at least one Australian drug-runner, if Prime Minister Tony Abbott will dance for him, in person, “like a stupid monkey.”
Abbott has already spent most of the last week humiliating himself via Skype to Widodo and his friends, by jumping around his office naked, pouring hot coffee on himself, and saying swears.
Widodo reportedly thinks the Australian Prime Minister is “very funny,” and was pleased to learn today that he will be on a plane to Indonesia this afternoon to fulfil the latest request.
Meanwhile, Australian Foreign Minister Julie Bishop has been in Jakarta, herself entertaining Indonesian officials, pretending to be a tiger and eating grapes from the floor after they are thrown at her and stomped on.
Widodo said Bishop and Abbott had both done “very well,” but he wasn’t making “any guarantees.”
“I have said repeatedly that Indonesia’s system of justice is not for sale by outside influence,” he said. “But you know, if Tony comes here, takes off his clothes, scratches his armpits, goes ‘ooh-ah’ and makes us all laugh, maybe I’ll think about it.”
“Probably not, though.”