New Zealanders over the age of 20 are excited and anxious today after McDonald’s announced that it would be relaunching its previously defunct Georgie Pie brand, with many reporting that they simply can’t wait to experience an uncomfortable mixture of nostalgia and disappointment followed by the stinging sensation of regret.
Georgie Pie was a fast food franchise operated in New Zealand between 1977 and 1998, when it was dissolved just two years after being purchased from its original owner Progressive Enterprises.
Since then, Georgie Pie has been the subject of numerous campaigns to bring it back, none of which had been successful.
But all of that changed today when Patrick Wilson, managing director of McDonald’s New Zealand, announced the return of the fast food icon at a packed press conference in Auckland.
“We are pleased today to announce the return of a kiwi legend,” said Wilson. “The return of Georgie Pie will be an exciting opportunity for all New Zealanders to taste our premium quality pies and realise that their nostalgic memories of the brand in no way resemble what the product is actually like.”
The announcement was music to the ears of 31-year-old Gavin Downes, who has been actively campaigning for Georgie Pie’s return since its closure when he was just 16.
“I can’t believe it’s finally here,” he said. “I’ve been waiting more than a decade to remind myself why pies are actually a terrible form of fast food that people only want because it’s something they used to have.”
He said he was now counting down the days until the relaunch, when he expected to buy and consume just two pies before retiring to his car to cry.
Patrick Wilson said that McDonald’s had conducted an extensive survey of its customers before reintroducing the brand, and that it had sensed a real hunger for disappointment brought on by false memories.
“What we found our customers really want is to bite into a Georgie Pie and say ‘yuck, this isn’t how I remember it,’ or ‘they’ve changed this. It’s not how it used to be. What a joke.’”
He said that McDonald’s was actively working to foster those feelings in its customers, and hoped to make the experience as disappointing as possible. This, he said, was behind the decision to only reintroduce one flavour of pie at just 11 McDonald’s restaurants in the Northland and Waikato regions.