The final leg of the Olympic torch relay was interrupted today in Rio de Janeiro, after the torchbearer, Renato Luiz Feliciano Lourenço, was mugged at gunpoint in the middle of the relay, and had the torch stolen from him.
Authorities were unable to apprehend the thief, as they had received bribe money.
A spokesperson for Rio’s 31st Military Police Battalion issued a written statement lamenting the “unfortunate” theft of the Olympic torch, but saying there was little that could be done, as their “hands are tied,” adding “literally, we are being held against our will. Send help.”
According to witnesses, nobody watching the relay intervened to help Lourenço, as what happened to did not strike them as alarming, or in any way out of the ordinary.
“We thought he did very well to only lose the torch,” said one bystander.
Another witness said something in Spanish.
International Olympic Committee President Thomas Bach said he was “saddened but not shocked” but the theft of the torch, and was actually pleased it had travelled as far through Brazil as it had.
Asked if the torch would be retrieved in time for the opening ceremony tomorrow, he replied “No, that’s it.”
Asked if there was another torch, he said “Of course not.”
“Honestly, the way it was panning out, there were some worries about us using a real flame in Rio anyway,” he said. “There were very real concerns voiced to me by people who are measuring the air quality, parts per million of this and that, and they said that if we used a real flame, there was a slight possibility that we’d actually ignite the whole atmosphere and all the air in the city, and everyone would burn alive.
“And when I heard that I said ‘Oh, well… I hope that doesn’t happen.’”
Despite the loss of the torch and fears about pollution, crime, political instability and unpreparedness, the 2016 Rio Olympics are off to a promising start, as athletes in the Olympic village report that the sludge in their accommodation has hardened, so doesn’t smell as much now.